37: Chapter 37: Not Picky About Food, Easy to Raise
About Food, Joanna sat in the high-backed velvet chair, her hands clasped in her lap as she navigated the unfamiliar elegance of the setting. The waiter arrived silently, placing the embossed menus before them.
Ashton glanced at the selections before looking over at her. “Do you have any specific preferences?”
“I’m not particular,” Joanna replied softly. “I appreciate simple flavors.”
“A rare quality,” Ashton noted, a faint, genuine smile easing the usual sharpness of his features. “In a world of complex demands, someone who finds contentment in the simple things is a welcome change. I find that I value that kind of straightforwardness.”
Joanna looked down at the table, her pulse still erratic. Every word he spoke seemed to carry a weight that she wasn't quite sure how to balance. Is he being sincere, she wondered, or is this just another layer of his social armor?
Taking a deep breath to steady her nerves, she finally looked up, meeting his direct gaze. “Ashton, may I ask you something... transparently?”
“Always,” he replied, closing the menu and giving her his full attention.
In the soft glow of the restaurant, his features were strikingly defined, radiating a level of confidence that was almost overwhelming. Joanna felt her resolve waver for a second before she pressed on. “Why me? Given your standing and the circles you move in, you have access to individuals who possess every social and strategic advantage. Why choose someone like me for this arrangement?”
She was realistic about her own merits, but she wasn't so idealistic as to think a man of Ashton Heath’s caliber made decisions based on fleeting impressions.
Ashton leaned back, his expression turning thoughtful. “I’ve never been a proponent of deception, Joanna. The truth is clinical: you are the only person who does not trigger my psychological aversion. For years, I’ve maintained a strict perimeter because physical proximity to others was a source of intense discomfort. With you, that barrier simply isn't there.”
Joanna remained silent, recalling what Zack had hinted at earlier. Hearing it directly from Ashton made the reality of his isolation much more poignant.
“But marriage is a profound commitment,” she countered, her brow furrowing. “Shouldn't you wait for someone you truly connect with? Someone you... love?”
“Love?” Ashton’s eyes narrowed slightly, as if he were analyzing an unfamiliar concept. “How do you define that?”
“It’s more than a reaction,” Joanna said, finding her voice. “It’s a sense of missing someone when they’re absent, a genuine contentment when they return. It’s the desire to share your triumphs and your setbacks with them first. It’s a feeling of safety and a profound urge to protect that connection above all else.”
As she spoke, she realized her own face was warming. The symptoms she was describing—the quickened pulse, the constant thoughts—mirrored exactly how she felt in his presence. She stopped abruptly, her heart pounding against her ribs. What am I saying? Am I describing my own reaction to him?
“I... I’m just speaking theoretically,” she added quickly, her eyes darting away.
Ashton watched her for a long moment, the silence between them thick with unspoken realization.
“If we are using your definition,” he said gravely, his voice dropping to a lower, more intimate register, “then consider this: when you are not there, my thoughts return to you. And when you are, the impulse to protect and be near you is the strongest I’ve ever experienced. Joanna, in your professional opinion... does that count?”